One of my favorite 90's ballads is Choppin' Broccoli written and performed by Dana Carvey. This euphonic masterpiece is an epic tale about a woman who overcomes obscurity and culinary catastrophe.

she's cold as ice
paradise
and the feeling
was nice

there's a lady I know
if I didn't know her
she'd be the lady
I didn't know

my lady she went downtown
she bought some broccoli
she brought it home

she's choppin broccoli...

Okay. Dana Carvey is a comedian, not a songwriter. Choppin' Broccoli is a skit, not a ballad. But after you've laughed off my introductory hoax, see if you can tell if the following is fact or fiction:

"The secret of attraction is to love yourself. Attractive people judge niether themselves nor others. They are open to gestures of love. They think about love, and express their love in every action. They know that love is not a mere sentiment, but the ultimate truth at the heart of the universe."

I came across this gem on the back of a recent non-fat caramel machiatto at Starbucks. The tidbit of wisdom is part of their campaign called "The Way I See It" where helpful hints for life are given by B-list figures. This particular nugget was mined from the writings of Deepak Chopra. I wish they would have left it in the shaft.

Deepak Chopra is a popular contemporary writer in the United States on spirituality and alternative medicine. Perhaps one of his most well known books is The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success: A Practical Guide to the Fulfillment of Your Dreams. He has been a frequent guest on Larry King Live, appearing a few times along with John MacArthur.

You might be wondering why I would even bother with this. I mean, who is actually getting wisdom from the back of their espresso? Hopefully not many. But I'm blogging about it precisely because I am bothered.

It's not the truth, though it's close. Instead it's just a spoof. If Deepak would have written, "Just kidding!" at the end I'd be happier. He didn't. And there's nothing to indicate it's a joke. To him it isn't.

Apparently it's not a hoax to others either. I heard the same cockamamie notion recommended by a "Christian" counselor speaking at a wedding I recently attended. He rambled on about how each person must love him or herself foremost if the marriage was to work. He basically counseled the couple to count themselves more important more important than the other. He said this self-love was the key to loving someone else.

It made me sick. I wanted to run over to the edge of the cliff and puke in the ocean. It was hack psychology and certainly had nothing to do with the Bible.

Or does it? What about:

Ephesians 5:29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it

Or:

Ephesians 5:33 let each one of you love his wife as himself

Don't these verses seem to indicate that person (the husband in this case) should love himself in order to love his wife? Hmmm ... let me think about it..., No! They do say that the husband should love his wife as he loves himself, but not so that he would be free to love his wife.

The apostle Paul appeals to a self-evident fact. No one ever hated his own body. He devotes himself to looking after it. He provides for it in every way. He supplies it with food (nourishes) to promote its development and maintain its health. He cares for it and cherishes it, keeping it warm when it's cold.

This principle also applies to the second greatest commandment, to love your neighbor as yourself (Leviticus 19:18, 19:34; Matthew 19:19, 22:39; Mark 12:31; Luke 10:27; Romans 13:9; Galatians 5:14; James 2:8). The assumption is that we already love ourselves, so we ought to care for others as we already care for ourselves. It is not, therefore, an instruction or a commandment to work at loving ourselves even more so that we can love others. None of us need any encouragement to love ourselves more. Of course those who love themselves "are open to gestures of love." We can never get enough attention. But it is irrational and anti-Biblical to suggest that self adoration is the pathway to greater affection for others.

There is a lot of bunk masquerading as wisdom. We desperately need to be filled with the knowledge of His will in all spiritual wisdom and understanding in order not to be deceived.

And in case you are still wondering what I really think, Deepak is a hack. He might as well be Chopra broccoli.